Why I decided to talk about this topic. More so because the air is seeping out of a nice balloon... metaphorically speaking. No don't me wrong. I actually like my job. It's just that sometimes people and politics get on my nerves. I have been in the work force well exceeding 10 years ...and don't start counting my age :). Seen enough of my share to appreciate home life.
The early part of it, when I was young and single, I was very focused on building experience and learning. I worked till very late in the night and got home around midnight. After all, I was young, and no dependents. Staying with my parents, all I have to take care of is my expenses. Probably why I was reluctant to get married early. Too comfortable.
Then life took a turn. I got married and had a honeymoon baby. My priorities started to change. Not immediate but gradual. That's probably why I regretted not seeing to Ryan's early development and now have to play catch up. The nanny despite her lack of responsibilities fitted our late work schedule. At this point, to whoever who is reading this, my point is while we work, do not take things for granted especially to your family and kids. And don't ever under estimate the importance of a child's early development. It affects him subsequently. We were young and ignorant. Looking on the bright side, we realized it later and still have time to fix it.
Goals change when you have little ones who depend on you. Fully and wholly depend on you. That shift things quite a bit. Balance of life becomes so very important. While we hit the road running when at work, we draw a line at a certain time latest 8pm to come home to our family. My husband and I have an understanding not to disturb each other during work hours as our work is very demanding. But we draw a line. Our children are very upset when they don't see us and put them in bed. Vice versa. That's why we don't like after work entertainment and such as well as weekend functions and events. While duty calls, we are able to manage occasionally. But to us, that is family time which is just 2 days in a week to rest and play with our kids.
How then do I work out my time when I have loads of work. Delivery is still a must. I have an understanding again with my boss from the on set of my recruitment. I promise delivery but if you don't see me working late in the office does not mean no commitment. I will manage after my cut off at work and then settling my children and my husband after that at home... then only I continue working later in the night. Tiring but I prefer it that way as I get the best of both worlds. The same with my husband. So, it works out.
As I aged :(, I feel that ambitions are still ambitions but in reality, it is a means to an end. Supporting and providing for my family. I don't like politics and neither am I competing with anyone. I'd like a good payoff during bonus and come home celebrating. I have been and still is in a high stress and political heavy organization and simply hate that part of it even though the functional part is good. A real dog eat dog world. No colleague is a true friend when it comes to actualizing their career goals. That's why they say it's lonely up there. My feng shui sifu told me to relax and don't take it too close to heart. Relax and enjoy what's more important. For health and happiness if not for anything else. I'm trying to follow that advice. My husband too.
1 comment:
I do likes your says" NO colleague is a true friend...is lonely at the top of the mountain" ...currently i am a full time mother. However; is courage and glad to know you survive at high stress work environment. because.. i left due to the atmosphere at the top is truly unpleasant. cold, lonely and stress...although the scenery looks beautiful.
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