Just Checked Out BAO BEI Reading Wonderland (Chinese Enrichment for Age 3-10)

I was just chatting with my friend the other day. While we are Chinese illiterate parents cracking our heads over how to help my kids through Chinese school later, I realise that the opposite is also true for parents who are weak in English, particularly in grammar. This friend even went through the trouble to have a 1-1 tuition for herself so that she can teach her daughter later. What mothers do for their kids!

Lets talk about my case. The debate goes on about whether Chinese iliterate parents should send their children to Chinese schools. How then can we teach them? I have heard so many stories about how young children 'suffer' through Chinese schools when they had weak foundation and do not have parents to help them. A lot ended up switching to English, rather kebangsaan schools later. Should I let my son go through that? I have also had advices to send my son to Chinese schools and reinforce with Chinese tuition to help them through. Double whammy! I really don't know!

I have been thinking of letting my son take Chinese reinforcement classes for now. Then see in the next 1 and half years how well he takes to it. If necessary, then I'll probably re-register him into English school instead. I know for a fact that if my son knows his work, he'll enjoy his lessons. Otherwise, he will lose confidence and isolate himself. It happened last year in kindergarten since he was a late speaker (versus all his classmates).

So I checked out this highly recommended Chinese enrichment centre - BAO BEI READING WONDERLAND. They have various branches. I'm thinking of sending both Ryan and Raymund (Raymund for a taste of lessons and to instill some discipline in him ;) ).

BAO BEI has daily lessons of 1 and half hour each - various slots available to choose. They even provide transportation facility in the event we need. The lessons are quite fun and lively, designed to engage young children and to develop the right brain. They have activities involving whole group, small groups and one to one. The group activities are like fun, games, art/crafts and music... all Chinese driven and guided by a few teachers at the same time. The 1-1 lessons drills on word recognition and Chinese vocabulary using the flash card method. The children are 'rewarded' with cards that they can take home to show off to their parents once they know a set of characters. They will be taught Chinese poems - even traditional poems by Li Pai (cantonese Li Pak) as well. When asked about how would children understand them - even older kids/adults are struggling! They come by with an explanation that it is to teach them how to pronounce Chinese and train them the smooth flow of Chinese sentences. Not so much on understanding the poem which they are not expected to. I guess that sounds logical to me! Every week, there is a theme. The children will be taken through each team with games, activites and songs. They also teach Chinese strokes through songs as well to make it simple and more interesting to the kids. My friend's kids love the lessons. They offer 5 days trial class to assess the new children. I will plan my leave first and arrange for my sons to go for it.

Most children like mine starts with the basic or foundation class. The basic or foundation level is equivalent to Malaysian Primary 1 Chinese level. Then they will move up all the way to Standard 4 Chinese level. Hence they did mention that this enrichment centre is meant for kids age between 3 and 10 years. I have also asked that for children like my kids who knows almost NO Chinese, how long does it take to go through the Foundation level. Any problem? I was told that the 1 on 1 will drill from the beginning. It would generally take 1.5 to 2 years to finish Foundation. Just in time for Ryan's Standard ONE!! For Raymund, I'm starting him young! As I said, I'll see Ryan through this first and decide if he is suited for Chinese Primary school.

Transformers 2: The Rise of the Fallen

I just watched Transformers 2: The Rise of The Fallen yesterday. Absolutely fantastic! I love action trillers. This beats it all!

I'm thoroughly amazed and fascinated at the details to each robot and its 'transformation' and I really salute to the technical team behind the movie. I was told it takes xx Gb for each transformation - sorry I forgot the number :( but then again to non-techy people like me, the end result is a real stunner! I thought the 1st show was good but this sequel is even better. This time, the director got really creative with the robots and their characters .. and of course their transformation. Thumbs up!

And of course, the guys are also looking out for the hotty Megan Fox. She really has the to-die-for body!! Sigh! Check this photo out!

All in all, it is THE show to watch now... and it must be in the cinema for the visual and sound effects. I was so absorbed into the movie right from the beginning and hooked on right till the end. I'm going to buy the DVD to join some of my precious collection. And I'm gonna watch it again and again. I do hope they are planning for Transformers 3 ++!!

I Found This Pattern Ruler that I Used to Play When I was a Kid!

I found this pattern ruler in Isetan. I remember in my girly days, this was sooo cheap and used to be sold by street peddlers. My dad got me a set that I soo wanted then - much larger ones too. Of course not so changgeh packaging la. It was the type with cardboard back and front covered with hard plastic like those 'China' toys.

And now, I found it at Isetan produced by the Japanese - nicely packages with cute pictures. Talk about repackaging! And of course, this little thing costed me RM5! I bought it anyway. One of the carrots to encourage my son to study. He loves it. And I thought that the activity can help him work on fine motor skills.

Encouraging My Son to Study

I've been trying to teach my son every evening during the week days - actually trying very hard coz it is really tiring after work. It's just that sometimes, I so want to have a quiet evening after a day's work. Sigh! Can't say I am very consistent about giving my son lessons but I'm renewing my effort again (fingers crossed). So every evening, after dinner, I'd rush my maid to clear up so that she can take care of my 2 younger ones while I concentrate on Ryan. Ryan would negotiate with me as to how many 'homework' he has to do. I'd say 5 and he'd say 1... I'd say 'No and lets do 3 .. OK! :) Of course, I don't always follow - haha! All for the fun of negotiating :)

At times, he is up to tricks. "Mommy, I'm very tired. I cannot open my eyes already. I do homework tomorrow ok?" Sometimes I just let it go :)

As parents, it is difficult to control our patience and 'temper' when our kids can't follow. Mainly because we are frustrated - 'It's so simple. How come you don't understand?' I have lost my temper many times when he was slower to catch up. He got real upset when I scolded him and said that he is not good - heart sick to watch his reaction :(

I began to realise that he learns faster and better with praises and encouragement once he has done something right. He is especially encouraged when he knows the work and done a good job with it. Kids this young love praises - 'clever', 'good boy', 'so fast!', 'better already' and so on. It really motivates him to do more. So, moms out there! Control your temper when you teach your kids ya! Never ever say 'You are stupid' to your child.

When the load gets heavy or when I hit a new area which needs more effort from him... I will dangle a carrot. There is a reward waiting for him at the end of the lesson. Stickers! And kids at this age just so love stickers. Only RM1 a piece. And in his favourite characters too - Ben10, Power Ranger, Spiderman, Cars, etc etc. Of course, Raymund gets one too. And sometimes, the reward is a surprise. Works most of the time :)

My Kids are too Attached to my Maids!

When we had Ryan, we were trying to control our expenditure. We didn't hire a maid. Ryan was sent to a babysitter during the day and after work, we fetched him back and took turns caring for him. As a result, Ryan is very close to us and is easily upset when we are not happy with him.

When I had my 2nd child Raymund, I decided to employ a maid to care for Raymund and to keep my house in order. And when Rachel arrived, there is no way that I can do without a maid since I'm working with fixed and sometimes extended hours. My maids turn out to be good, listens to instructions and easily managed. My kids love them. In fact, my 2 younger ones just loved them too much! Unlike Ryan, Raymund is so attached with my 1st maid who cared for him since he was 1 month old. He is not so close with us especially when he was younger. Now, it is easier to bridge the gap since he is able to communicate. But then, his 'ala' mother is still the person he would run to if he is upset or want something. Very sad!

Now my little princess Rachel is already showing that she prefers my 2nd maid. So very attached and she is just 7 months old. Mummy and daddy are quite secondary to her even though we spent time to carry and play with her after work. When she sees my maid, she would want to be carried and pampered by her. Just like today, I sent my maid to fetch Ryan from his class and I was waiting for them in the car with Rachel. The moment my girl saw her leaving the car, she started crying and screaming and looking out for her. She cried for a good 20min and only stopped when she came back and held her in her arms. I'm quite upset because she is my precious little girl but she treats the maid like her 'mom'. This is the price that I have to pay for being a working mum who employs someone to care for her children. The parents-kids bonding is affected.

Chinese Enrichment Class at BAO BEI READING WONDERLAND

I have heard so much about BAO BEI READING WONDERLAND.

I first heard about it when I was discussing with other moms in my son's kindergarten about how to help our kids in Chinese. They sent their 3-4 year old children to Bao Bei to master Chinese. It was claimed that 3 year olds can recognize up to 1000 Chinese characters when they attend Bao Bei.

My friends are happy with their kids progress in Bao Bei and the classes are actually quite fun. Their kids love it. They use flashcards, music, games, reading and a lot more to drum in to language. It is a 1 and half hour daily lesson from Monday to Friday. And they provide transport if needed.

I'm thinking of sending both Ryan and Raymund to Bao Bei in July or August. They offer 5 days free trial (Except for school holidays) and I'm looking at when I can take leave to attend a few lessons with them. My kids are so 'kwai lo' - their Chinese almost non-existence. And I can't even teach them as I'm Chinese illiterate. So sad and helpless! I hope Bao Bei classes can help them build their foundation for Primary school. I was told that the Sri Petaling branch is very good.

I'll find out more when I visit them and I'll probably blog about it later.

What COULD Have Been a Great Shopping Experience in IKEA ..BUTTT....

I had a wonderful lunch with my mom and my family on Sunday. We decided to pick up Ryan's birthday present from Toy"R"Us at 1 Utama and then adjourned to IKEA. I wanted to get those nice plastic containers with lids, 3 big ones and a couple of the smaller ones, to organize my junks at home. I got them last time and found that they are pretty useful and neat though a bit pricey. At the same time, I'd like to take my mom and my kiddos for a good walk after lunch.

So what could have been a great leisurely and shopping experience was shattered at the paying counter. The cashier asked me if I wanted a plastic bag for my purchase and I said of course - how else can I carry my stuff? He asked again and this time told me that I have to PAY for my plastic bag else I'd just have to carry those items to the car park. The alternative is to buy their IKEA blue plastic bag @ RM1.90! I bought 3 big containers, 2 packs of those 4-in-1 smaller containers, a twin pack chopping boards and some towels ... all stacked up about 2 feet high and they expect me to 'balance and carry' them to the car park if I don't buy the plastic bags from them. And my car was at The Curve because there was INSUFFICIENT PARKING SPACE in IKEA!!! This is ridiculous!! I never paid for plastic bags and it is really NOT about the 20-30 cents that I have to pay. It is really about the principal around it.

1. IKEA is selling big items which need big bags to carry.
   
   
2. They don't have sufficient parking space on weekends - so we have to park further. I can't get trolleys to the Curve etc. Does this mean we have to spend a lot more on plastic bags to carry my purchases?
   
   
3. This is a recycle drive. Is selling plastic bags (be it the the 20-30 cents ones or the nice looking plastic IKEA blue bags for RM1.90) a solution to recycle or another way to make money? I still saw customers paying for plastic bags to carry their purchases.
   
   
4. When I was abroad, retailers campaigning on recycling provide ALTERNATIVES to assist customers with their purchase... like brown bags and so forth. The alternative here is a PLASTIC IKEA bag which is yet another purchase with IKEA
   
   
5. If plastics is important in this recycling business, why are the products pre-wrapped in plastics still?
   
   
6. I guess the awareness was low or I'm just simply blind. I didn't see any prominent signs that said we have to pay for plastic bags at the entrance of IKEA showroom until I reached the paying counter. Else I would have made an informed purchase decision.
   
   
7. We bought 2 dozens of curry puffs but were given 4 small paper bags plus a coffee cup. Why not provide a bigger paper bag instead for customers' convenience. How do they think we can carry our bag, our purchases, 4 paper bags with no handles, coffee cup and at the same time care for our kids and older folks??

As I said.. this is about my principal as a customer and I'm not convinced about the approach in supporting the campaign. I was really irritated at the inconvenience. And I heard other customers complaining as well. Sigh! Venting out in my blog now...

Ryan's Birthday Today

Today is Ryan's birthday. We celebrated his birthday with his friends in school and he was so very proud and shy about it :)

Here's his Ben10 Birthday cake.

Ben 10 is one of his favourite characters!

Ryan and his classmates

Ryan's proudly giving out little presents for his friends (sweets and chocs)

Raymund was too shy to join in.

Our present for Ryan - Lego to build creativity :)

And of course, Raymund gets one too!

About Confinement & Confinement Ladies

The last thing you want when you've just given birth and recuperating is a

stressful confinement or a problematic confinement lady! Confinement is very important after birthing. When I had Ryan, I was so excited over a new baby in the family that I rested little and was very selective with my 'poh' herbs and food. It took me 6 months to fully recover! I was good (eerr... better la) when I was carrying Raymund and Rachel. All it took was just a month to be pink in health. So, advise, advise... especially for new mums ... resting enough and eating well is so important during confinement. Worry about health first. Worry about your figure and go diet much later. New mums have all the excuse in the world to be a bit more meaty ;) :). I used to retort on jibes (joking ones la) .. 'I just gave birth to a baby; what excuse do YOU have???' Ha-ha! Works all the time esp with men!

So, as I was saying, problems with confinement lady will NOT help at all! Recommendation and referral may help you get a better confinement lady (CL, for short). But do bear in mind, everyone's interaction with the same person may not be the same. One can get along with a CL and another may fight with the same person. At the end of the day, it takes two hands to clap. It is really all about communication and establishing an understanding with your CL who will be staying with you for a whole month! I went thru hell with my second CL but later established a middle ground with her to 'tahan' the rest of the month. How to get help half way thru my confinement?

Here are some pointers. Not professional advice - just little old me giving my 2 cents worth :)

1. Always establish an understanding with the CL during hiring. State what you expect her roles to be (esp if it goes beyond the usual - eg. washing and cooking for hubby and family) and what you are particular about. Get her agreement. Sometimes, they may up the fees if you require them to do more. Negotiate.
2. When she comes on board, spent a little time with her and again establish required chores, likes/dislikes and common understanding. My last CL was wonderful. We shared the same view - that is to lay down all that we thought and get a common understanding -- so that, no misunderstanding later.
3. Try not to get a CL who is too calculative. You will get headache throughout your confinement. Of course, it is hard to know initially. So, go on your gut feeling or ask your friends who refer you.. AND simply tell the CL not to be calculative. I did with mine :) Hehe!
4. If your baby is sleeping with the CL, do NOT allow her to lock the door at night. You do not want negligence, etc etc. Just firmly say that you want to check on the baby from time to time. But be understanding - try not to disturb your CL when she is resting. It is a very tiring and strenuous job and they are mostly older ladies.
5. You have to spot check .. tactfully. But don't go hostile unless there is a reason to. Remember that you need a peaceful and restful confinement.
6. Observe her pattern and how she manages you and the baby. If you have anything that you disagree with, discuss with her. Don't get stressed out about it.
7. Make sure that she is clean when handling the baby.
8. Make sure that she washes the bottles immediately after every feed esp at night. Use new clean bottles every time. My 2nd CL gave me nightmare about this!
9. Make sure that she cleans the baby properly after every feed. You don't want rashes on the baby's soft skin. I'm very particular about this.
10. When she cooks for you, she will know which herbs to give you at which time. Don't reject as some may be yucky to take (like freshly pound concentrated 'kunyit' juice - urghh!). Eat all if you want good health and fast recovery. I learnt this lesson from my 1st confinement.
11. Eat the quantity which your CL gives you if you can. Especially when you are breast feeding. Worry about dieting later.
12. If your baby is sick or not well, she must inform you immediately and don't play doctor. Some CL have traditional ways which they think they can cure the baby. Like in my case, Ryan's belly button was still wet and bleeding after a week. My CL applied sesame oil on the belly button. After that, his belly button swelled up bigger than a 50-cents coin. My doctor scolded her when we took Ryan for treatment. She meant no harm but ignorance is not bliss here :(
13. As I said, being a CL is no easy job. Lack of sleep. Full concentration required. Play your part and coorporate if it is reasonable to.
14. Lastly, get comfortable with your CL. Some can turn out to be great friends later just like my Rachel's CL :)

Given all these, you may still end up with a hardcore CL. Or just simple mismatch in chemistry.

At the end of the day, you have only 1-2 months to rest and recuperate. Just decide accordingly.

Hope this helps!

Planning for Ryan's Birthday

Next week is my boy's birthday. 

Like last year, I intend to get him a cake and let his classmates celebrate with him in his kindergarten. Celebrating with us adults is not as fun to young children. And, I think that it is still too young to throw him a b'day party. So, bringing a cake with some tit bits to kindy sounds like a good idea. He enjoyed it last year. His classmates ooh-ed aah-ed over his cake and sang him the B'day song. He was proud and shy at the same time. Took some pictures and videos. He can still remember it :) Simple yet memorable.

This year, I have prepared some wrapping papers to make little paper bags. Bought some sweets, jelly puddings and chocs as well. I'm quite careful to get the 'healthier' ones....haha! like real!! How healthy can sweets be?! I just chose those that don't come with preservatives. I'm going to involve Ryan in making and packing these little gifts for his friends. Part craft, part teaching the concept of 'giving' and not just 'receiving'. Then, I'll hunt for his cake. Chocolate cake - his favourite :)

Tomorrow is shopping day. Ryan gets to choose his present. .. and of course, Raymund gets one too.. sigh! Ain't want no fighting at home... but then again....boys are boys!! My little girl is still the sweet and mellow one :) - for now.

My husband and I have taken leave to celebrate with him in his kindergarten. Bringing little Raymund too - to let him get a 'feel' of school (almost time to send him already). Hope they will enjoy it. I will post some photos later. 

Apologize

Readers,

Thanks for following my blog. I do apologize for the silence on my end. I have not been well over over the last few days. Don't know what's wrong - whole body aching and a flaming throat. Must be the weather! I have lots to blog about. And I'll make up for lost time this coming weekend. See you then or maybe sooner.

Hiring Confinement Ladies

I delivered 3 babies and I had 3 different confinement ladies. The first one for Ryan was ok - all new experiences for me and nothing to compare. I couldn't get her for Raymund because she has stopped being a confinement lady and became a baby sitter instead due to medical reasons. The 2nd confinement lady was a nightmare! Rachel's confinement lady was very good and we have kept in contact since. She is great and helped me kept my house clean even though I have maids. In fact, she cooked for my little girl's full moon just to help me save cost. We got along very well. Recently, She just made bak chang specially for me. Not bad, ya?

After 3 rounds, I thought I would like to help preggy moms like my Cousin Vivien :) around the topic of confinement ladies based on my experiences. Here are some of the Q&As. Enjoy reading :)

When to hire a confinement lady (CL)?

About 6 years ago, it was ok to hire a CL after the pantang period (3-4 months). As time goes by, demand went up and supply of CLs are scarce. So, people book CL just when they found out that they are pregnant. I have such difficulties finding a CL for Rachel when I was 3 months pregnant - I was considered late!!

Confinement Lady or Confinement House?

There are some confinement houses that offer food and board for moms and their newborns. It is more expensive. Some moms choose them over CL as they do not want strangers in their house or for convenience purposes. I have no such experiences. So, can't help you there but to let you know that there is such an option. 

What is the going rate for Confinement Ladies?

5 years ago was RM2,600-RM2,800 for 30 days. Rachel's CL at the end of last year was RM3000. The going wage now is about RM3300 (could be higher!) and most CLs are only offering 28 days. So when you ask about the wage, ask how many days they are going to work with you. If you choose 28 days, it would mean that your CL will not be around to help you on your baby's full moon. If you have parents to help you, then this should be ok.

Important!! If your confinement is crossing over Chinese New Year, the wage will double!!! They may also ask for days off during Chinese New Year. Do try to see if you can negotiate for lower.

What about angpow for confinement ladies?

Angpow is necessary for 'pantang' purposes on the part of the Confinement Ladies. My CL even ask for an angpau when she started work just for 'yee see'/ritual purposes only. The main angpau is at the end of the confinement when you pay them the wage. Some CLs will insist for a specific amount upfront for the angpau eg RM200. Others will leave it up to you. So, you can give according to how happy and satisfied you are with their services. 

Booking fee for confinement ladies?

There is no written contract with CL. If you are happy and they are happy :), then they will ask for a deposit to confirm their service. They have to know how serious you are so that they will not commit to another 'client' for the same time. Try not to give more than RM300.

What is the role of a confinement lady?

Strictly speaking a CL's role is just to care for the mother and the new born baby ONLY. This will include cooking and washing for the mother and the baby. Some CLs stick by this. 

If you need the CL to cook, wash and care for your husband and older kids/parents, please tell them and see if they are ok with it. Lay down the duties that you need from them and be reasonable about it because the main focus is still the mother and the demanding little one. They may ask for more $$.

Do be open about this and clarify upfront as you don't want to stress up your confinement with quarrels and dissatisfaction.

What to look out for in a Confinement Lady?

• Ask your friends to refer. This is so that they will be able to tell how 'good' the recommended CL is. 
• If it is possible (since some CLs are from outstation), meet up with the CL and see if you 'like' her. 
• A good cook!!! The best part about confinement is CONFINEMENT FOOD!!! This is the one and only time that you can eat Confinement Food without getting over-heated. So maximize this pleasure with a good cook. Some hubbies look forward to it. Mine did :)
• Non calculative CL - you will know when you speak to her. Remember, you have to stay with her for 1 month!
• One with years of experience. There are lots of 'pantangs' to follow and Chinese herbs to take at each stage in the 30-day confinement. A good CL will take care of you until you are rosy with health.
• Not a lazy CL. You don't want to 'wake' the CL when your baby is screaming for attention or push her to clean up or care for the baby - I've hearing stories about this. But of course, how can you tell that at point of hire?? Then a referred CL is all the more important.

Lastly, is it better to hire from Confinement Agencies eg Pei Ling?

I have never tried or even approach these agencies. Of course there are some up sides to it. But, I prefer to 'know' my CL before they come to my house. With these agencies, you may not know who you get. Check out AMN Mead Johnson forum. There are some discussions about this.

Hope this helps. I will cover in another post about how to manage your CL when they finally arrive at your doorstep. Enjoy reading :)